The Degeneral Visits Sin City

For Students Reading Week represents an opportunity to do almost anything but read. Many decide to travel to more tropical climates and enjoy some hard drinks and hard bodies on the beach. Others use this opportunity to hit the slopes and enjoy plenty of powder both on and off the hill. The Degeneral, on the otherhand, used this opportunity to take a rite of passage that is required for all young males in western culture. That of course being a trip to Las Vegas. The city is entrenched with the very roots of the debaucherous behaviour. Gambling, free-booze and prostitution. These are the very pillars in which Vegas was built upon on, as well as some of the basic principles of the Degeneration Nation. The Degeneral was going to spend the next 4 days of his life there.

First thing that one must understand about Las Vegas is that your experience their in relation to the time elapsed has no bearing outside of anywhere except Vegas. It's kind of like the island on Lost but we will get into that later. From the very beginning the trip had the makings to be epic. An initial group of 5 of us was to fly on two separate flights from Toronto at 8:55pm on Sunday night. And 3 more would make the drive from L.A. a day or so later.

The best thing about flying at night is that it is socially acceptable to get hammered. I hate flying in the morning because everyone looks at me like an alcoholic. At 10pm im just looked at as a heavy drinker.

After checking in the group does the obvious and hits the bar. The worst things about airports these days...

... no its not the security, no its not the ridiculous lines, and no its not the fact that you cant bring toothpaste on a 13 hour flight. Its the fact that airports no longer have smoking rooms. Look, im all for isolating smokers so people dont have to smell second hand smoke. I hate second hand smoke. I love first hand, but i hate second hand smoke. But that doesnt mean I should not be allowed to enter a vacuum sealed room with poor-ventilation thats jam packed with other smokers and take 15 minutes off my life. That is my choice and the choice of all the other people in that terrarium of life...

... Anyways, im a few pints in deep, longing for a smoke, when who walks into the bar? None other then two of my buddies from school - and where are they going? Vegas baby vegas. So these two guys, who we will call Anthony and Lbow, are actually on the other flight with the rest of my team. We continue to pound the beer and eventually part ways. Me and my buddy who from here on out will be reffered to as The Flash boarded our pain and continued the drinking.

I dont know what it is about drinking on planes but it definately gets you more bombed. Maybe its the air, maybe its the altitude but dude, after 6 Canadians on the plane and a few rounds of 1 vs 1 Flip Cup I was feeling it. Needless to say, the flight flew by and in no time we were landing in Vegas - it was 1:15am Vegas time. By 2 we were checked in and on the floor. The absolute most beautiful thing about vegas is that there is no last call and there is no natural light. At 3:00 am it might as well be 3:00pm and no one can seem to tell the difference.

Now this was the Degeneral's first time ever really gambling, I'd played poker both casually as well as online but never in a casino. And as fate would have it I would never even touch any cards. The Flash, who I owe greatly for this, spent the first 25 minutes of his trip teaching me the basics of Craps. By 3:00 am I had $2bills on the table and having the time of my life. - OH by the way not only are all you drinks free, all your cigarettes are free ... I was ordering Double GreyGoose and Redbull with side of Marlboros. - So night one is floating away when at 4:00 my Blackberry goes off. Whose calling? None other then Anthony and Lbow who are at a club with bottle and booth, and not only that they've ran into two more our friends from school. So I part ways with my travelling partners and hit cab too the club. After greasing my way in I join up with my buddies and proceed to get BOD.

At some point, which I assume can be no later then 6 am because thats what time the club closed I heading back to the Casino on my way own. I remember being surprised and somewhat disappointed that I was never solicited by a prostitute. Eitherway after re-entering the Casino and enhaling that oxygen enriched air I sobered up (relatively) and went back to the craps table. Now the next 4 hours are the most inebriated and unintelligible of the trip but also possibly the most significant. From 6 until 11 I managed to win a G playing craps. This money would be used to fuel my debauchery, and possibly others, for the rest of the trip.

Next thing I know the Blackberry is going off again, The Flash has arisen. I cashed out and headed off to breakfast.

The events that followed breakfast are nothing more than vague flashes for me. I know we went for a walk a long the strip where Im not sure but I may have been singing "Glamorous" by Fergie. I remember sitting in a comfortable chair in a store for way too long and being asked to leave. And next thing I know i was on my way up to my room. It was now just past noon. Day 1 was officially over. At least in vegas time it was. Little did i know i was to wake up in 4 hours and continue my scientific experiment how long a body can function solely on alcohol, caffeine, and cigarettes.

***** TO BE CONTINUED
COMING NEXT - DAY 2 IN THE CITY OF SIN